How important is it to live honestly? When we get to the end of it and we see the lives we've bumped and rattled on the way, will it make a difference?
Only if there's a God.
If there isnt, then we're unobligated, to ourselves or anyone else. Right up to the end when the light goes out and they close the lid on the box.
I ride the bus to my day job, downtown. There's no moral reason. My attitude is just better if I let someone else fight the traffic. Riding the bus saves me money and frustration. With the money I save, I can go out to lunch now and then. With a good attitude, I can even get someone else to go with me.
I had a good friend who died of cancer. We used to have lunch together. He was a good man who loved his wife. When she died it took the heart right out of him. She went suddenly, without warning. It was two years before he could get out and see people. My daughters called him Grampa. They knew him as a pleasant old man who loved their mom like his own girl and saw something in their dad worth taking the time. They cut his grass when he couldnt do it anymore.
The cancer drugs took him back to another time, when he was another man. He was brash and reckless, opinionated and sometimes crude- in a hazy medicated fog. I helped carry his coffin.
It's a little before midnight now and I'm having some ice cream. It's part of my new health plan. Anything I shouldnt to eat tomorrow, I eat today. That way I can work it off and eat something else later. The way it works is, I'll eat the ice cream now and when I start wanting it tomorrow, I'll eat an apple. Then tomorrow night, I'll eat something that I shouldnt eat on Sunday, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera...
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